An article for Arts Professional

Gillian Bates takes a look at the lighter side of life and work as a freelance in the arts.

Fed up with low wages? Hovering on the brink of self-employment? Having been a freelance arts marketer for over a year now, I thought it was time to pass on the benefits of my knowledge with some simple pros and cons.

Let’s start with the cons:

• Paying Income Tax. Whoever dreamed up the idea of paying in advance? What kind of incentive is that? It’s like being fined for good behaviour. Like all arts freelancers in this frantic funding world, I don’t actually know where my next job is coming from, let alone what my income will be. So, whatever crystal ball the taxman is using, can I have one for Christmas, please?
• Paying National Insurance. The word ‘national’ is fair enough but insurance? If it’s insurance, where is my policy? How much no-claims bonus do I get? And what am I being insured against, precisely? Weapons of mass destruction? If that’s the case I’d like to shop around for a new broker and a cheaper policy.

Happily, the pros do outweigh the cons and here they are:

• Watching Trisha on the telly whilst replying to early morning emails. (Loads of DNA tests and every one a cliff-hanger – Trisha telling each guest just how precious they are while maintaining the demeanour of a world weary traffic warden. Magic!)
• Power naps in the afternoon (afternoon telly is awful). It’s possible to switch off the computer and take a doze but never for more than an hour or you wake up with the sensation of a massive hangover and spend the afternoon in a somnolent daze.
• Not being secretive about betting on Ebay. Imagine never having to hurriedly minimise the Internet window ‘cause someone has walked in on you. This is the true joy of the arts freelancer. Strictly speaking, when I said, “betting” I should have said “bidding”, but everyone knows that with Ebay you don’t really want the item. You just want the adrenaline rush of beating the other 187 people who’ve been bidding all day as you place your first, and winning, bid in the last five seconds of the auction.